Sunday, 24 January 2010

the best days of your life, they say you never will forget.

how many promises, be honest girl,
how many tears you let hit the floor?
how many bags have you packed,
to take him back, tell me that.
when you're mine in the world,
there'll be one less lonely girl.
im gonna put you first,
ill show you what you're worth.

my life of late has been a string of stresses and troubles that i can't seem to shake. i've had exam pressures piled and piled onto me and i have found that lately i can't seem to take the pace that life is suddenly demanding of me. and then the funniest thing happened, all through reading books i have read before.

Emily: The thing is, I have this problem. Because when I want to talk about my boyfriend to my best friend, I realise they're both you.

i started reading the twilight series over again, and i read bella's account of what she sees in edward (if only a bit exagerrated) and then i found the lack of appreciation of my own boyfriend and i found that if i just stopped and thought about the things he's actually saying to me, and the things that we do for each other without actually realising, i discovered that all the time i tell him he could do this that and the other, he actually gives all that and more and i'm just so stupid. and i am NEVER taking that for granted, because he deserves more than that.

Chris: Do you know what it's like to love someone so much, that you can't see yourself without picturing her? Or what it's like to touch someone, and feel like you've come home? What we had wasn't about showing off what you've got, the way it was for other kids our age. We were, well, meant to be together. Some people spend their whole lives looking for that one person. I was lucky enough to have her all along.

and then i bought the notebook novel and i read songs of the humpback whale by jodi picoult, and watched the pact, after watching the film that makes me spout fountains, and all the things that allie and noah and jane and oliver and emily and chris say to one another, i hear myself and dan say to each other. and all the times i read these books before, i had done what i did when me and dan talked, i had read over the words that he had said to me, and not understood that they meant the same to him as they do to me.

so its up to you,
and its up to me,
and we meet halfway,
on the way back down to earth.
tell me how i could ever be,
normal somehow,
tell me this is the for the best,
so why am i in tears?
so we fight through the hurt,
and we cry and we cry,
and we live, and we learn,
and we try and we try,
then its up to you, and its up to me,
and we always meet halfway,
on the way back down to earth.
down to earth - justin beiber

i suppose im ashamed to admit this. i suppose for the past two years i took for granted what i had always dreamed about having, and i know in my heart i was stupid and so wrong to do so.

Noah: Thats what we do! We fight. You tell me when I'm being an arrogant son of a bitch, and I tell you when your being a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. But I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have this two second rebound rate and then you go back to doing the next pain in the ass thing.
Allie: So what, Noah.
Noah: So it's never going to be easy, Allie. Hell, it's gonna be so hard. And we'll have to work at it every single day. But I'm gonna do that because I want you, Allie. I want all of you, forever, every day.

im sorry for posting such a whiney love blog that would drive me up the wall to read. its been a great relief to have my whole life mirrored to me, and i feel a huge weight has been lifted.

Chris: She was all the things I wasn't. And I was all the things she wasn't. She could paint circles around anyone; I couldn't even draw a straight line. She was never into sports; I've always been. Her hand, it fit mine.

i love you dan :)

love me, love me,
say that you love me,
fool me, fool me,
oh how you do me,
kiss me, kiss me,
and say that you miss me,
tell me what i want to hear,
tell me you love me.
the cardigans - lovefool

my last little bit of this is to say that i'd really reccomend you to read the following
-the notebook - nicholas sparks
-songs of the humpback whale - jodi picoult
-the pact - jodi picoult

they are such beautiful stories, well and truly.

night bloggers.

Wednesday, 13 January 2010

local disappointment.

yes, sorry folks, i've fallen for Justin Beiber's music.
how many photographs, are you taping back?
while you tell me you couldn't see the open door.
but no more if you let me inside your world, there'll be one less lonely girl.
i'm going to put you first, show you what you're worth.
i'm going to fix your broken heart, give you a brand new start,
i'm going to take her, and leave the world,
with one less lonely girl.
that song really reminds me of the stuff that happened before dan and makes me really grateful for dan.
all the stuff i'm really grateful i've left behind.
and made new starts from.
all this ice makes me cross!
i dont like it at all, especially when you fall over and it doesnt hurt, but then you're wet and cold.
bah humbug.
summer now please!

Tuesday, 5 January 2010

happy new year guys!

sorry i didnt make a post, the holidays have been mental as!
had future plans to make and stuff...
christmas was aaace, got lots and lots!
a new shiny iPod touch that i cannot work, some gorgeous fluffy slippers and jewellery and TONS of creams and Body Shop stuff... mmmm gorgeous!
dan bought me some pretty amazing stuff too... aahh i love him :)
school closed today thanks to snow and is closed tomorrow which is good news for me :D its a shame how the whole country goes to a standstill when it snows.
we had a party at ours new years eve and set off some fire lanterns and stood on the street and sang auld lang syne with glasses of champagne and hugged in the snow... it was so cute :)
and now, i am back to the normal routine, school early mornings, work, nags, etc etc etc.
but today has been such a lovely day, i have to say.
i got stranded at school, no buses, no cars nothing! so my lovely dan had to come to meet me and take me home because i would really have fallen over, which was luckily avoided.
and we walked home in the snow and he came back for a cup of tea before i had to go.
and now... i am listening to Liszt's Liebestraum No.3, on Facebook and i WAS on the phone to Dan, but then the phone died, so I am off to charge it.
Night! And happy new year! xxxxxx